In addition to my art and zine stuff, I also do solo game development/design both analog and digital. I make queer narrative video games like visual novels, dating sims and Bitsy games. On the other hand, I make original indie ttrpg content for niche audiences, as well as original live action roleplaying games (LARPs). I even make some tools to facilitate playing analog roleplaying games online, mostly Discord bots. I even got 80% of the way towards finishing an Android app based zine trading social network, but then I got distracted and never went back to the project. I do that a lot, getting distracted from a current project by shiny new ideas. So I've got lots of back burner projects and few finished projects. I also run a Discord server for queer game devs (and cis straight allies who are respectful and want to portray queer characters in their games). AND I have a queer-only (no allies, ace and aro inclusive) server for people interested in indie ttrpgs.
You can find most of the information here either on my Notion space or Itch.io site, but there's a few extras here that you can't find anywhere else yet.
Small Complete Game Jam Projects:
- Chrysalis Cycle Rebirth! - Unapologetically queer and neurodivergent magical girl genre ttrpg
- Camp Ravenrock - Queer SF/Fantasy Summer School VN
- Mary Sue Dating Sim - Exactly what it says, with trope subversion
- Sp(ace) - Bitsy game about being asexual on a generation ship
- Silversiders - Post-apocalyptic dystopian LARP set in a frozen future city populated by mutants (with some world shattering secrets + explorations of queerness)
- Do the Thing - A game about executive dysfunction
- LARP Bot - A Discord bot for playing LARPs on Discord in the MIT Assassins' Guild style
- Queer Zine Fest Simulator - A Discord horde LARP about queer zine fests
- Dream Afar - A Belonging Outside Belonging TTRPG of magical guardians across the multiverse
- The Confluence - A freeform LARP for the Golden Cobra Challenge 2020 about sad, lonely gods meeting at a confluence of worlds every 100 years
Far Back Burner:
- We Met Once, Perhaps in a Dream - A short visual novel about guilt, love, and memory set in a world where people are biologically immortal, but can only remember the past ten years
- Neurometaphysical Recursion - Weird little recursive worldbuilding/storytelling game made for the One Page RPG Jam
- bitter/SWEET after/LIFE - A ttrpg/LARP/difficult-to-define game for two players, one playing an unintentional kill and the other playing their victim, for the Hot Horror Jam
- Starry Messenger Troika Background - Supplemental content for the Troika RPG based on a story I came up with in high school, for the Troika Backgrounds Jam
- The A-List - Short Asexual Superhero VN
- Over Water, Under Hill - Fantasy Asexual Adventure VN
- Pandaemonium - Queer modern day magical girl Pandora myth VN
- Void Calling - Oneshot post-apocalyptic road trip ttrpg
- Better Self - Dystopian time travel ttrpg where two players play the same character
- Let's Trade Zines - Zine Trading Social Network Android App
- Femme Story - Queer autobio VN
- Reflection of Souls - Story-driven Medieval Science Fiction RPG Thing
- The Third Light - Little RPG thing for a game jam about the Tunguska event, aliens, and doomsday devices
Here's some info about my various projects, mostly pulled from the Itch.io descriptions:
Chrysalis Cycle Rebirth!
Chrysalis Cycle Rebirth! is (or will be) a tabletop role playing game that takes the magical girl genre and shines it through a queer, neurodivergent prism. I am writing this game specifically from an autistic, chronically ill, bi/pan, polyplatonic, arospec, ace spectrum viewpoint, because that is who I am. I wrote this game to fill a niche that I feel still needs to be filled. While I know there are games out there that encourage unapologetic queerness, I feel like I’ve never seen a game that encourages autistic and other neurodivergent people to #TakeOffTheMask and not be ashamed to be their authentic selves?
In my own experiences as a queer, autistic gamer, I feel like I’ve gotten so much out of roleplaying games especially. Mostly LARP, but also tabletop games. They are a safe place to try out different social expressions and relationships without real world consequences. Messing up helps you learn, and can help to tell an entertaining story. I’ve also met so many other autistic and other neurodivergent people through LARP and tabletop communities. I think we’re attracted to these kinds of games more than the general population. So where are the games that celebrate us and help us grow without patronizing us? Where are the games that even mention us specifically and not as defective or limited? I feel like there’s so much possibility here, so I created the Neurodiversity in Games Jam as an excuse to make this game, and in the hope that other neurodivergent people could continue this conversation. Because this is just the beginning.
Also, the magical girl genre is awesome, and is especially attractive to the queer community, particularly femme people. A lot of personal meaning can be derived from the idea of transforming into a magical being and fighting evil with the strengths inside ourselves. We can change the world for ourselves and for others. We can become something greater than what the nagging voices in the back of our minds and outside ourselves say we can be. Our femme can be powerful.
While this is a game taking most of its inspiration from the magical girl genre of manga and anime, not all of the magical characters in this game are girls. All genders can be magical beings (known as MAGICALS generally, or specifically MAGICAL GIRLS, MAGICAL GUYS, and MAGICAL ENBYS (or any other gender term)) here. The main concept of the game is the metaphor of the CATERPILLAR, CHRYSALIS, and BUTTERFLY.
The CATERPILLAR in the metaphor is people whose identities push them to the margins of a society that isn’t built for people like them. In the world of Chrysalis Cycle Rebirth!, everyone has the potential for magic, but most never discover it, particularly those who are centered in society. CATERPILLARS, on the other hand, hide who they are in an attempt to survive, not living as their true selves. Suppressing one’s true self uses up a lot of energy, including magical energy, which makes CATERPILLARS in particular draw energy into themselves like a vacuum. This energy vacuum makes them light up like a beacon to celestial beings who call themselves MENTORS, who are broadly known as BUTTERFLIES, because they used to be exactly like the CATERPILLARS.
Remembering what it was like, some MENTORS seek out these “beacons” of magical energy and understand the potential for their true selves to manifest. They know that CATERPILLARS have the potential to chrysalize, and to eventually become a BUTTERFLY. They seek out and teach them to harness their magic, with the all-important lesson that the less energy they spend on masking themselves, the more they can use on magic, connection, healing, and growth. Once this realization is made, a CATERPILLAR becomes a CHRYSALIS.
The CHRYSALIS (MAGICAL GIRL/GUY/ENBY) stage is the time of transformation, during which powers manifest. In the CHRYSALIS stage MAGICALS are able to project their magical self outside of their body while asleep or otherwise unconscious. This avatar allows them to fight evil in whatever form it takes without any threat to their life... unless the location of their physical body is discovered. MAGICALS must use their powers to fight evil, do good, and make BONDS, eventually using the magical energy from within and drawn in from without to ASCEND. What they do after that is up to them.
The current draft is at ~125 pages (including many pages of outlines and lots of tables that need to be filled in), and about 20k words of content, and the finished game will be somewhere between 150 and 200 pages (8.5” x 5.5”), possibly more. I hope to eventually run a Kickstarter for a print version of the game and for a zine of supplemental content written by other queer neurodivergent ttrpg devs. If you are a queer, neurodivergent ttrpg dev or are otherwise interested in this idea, contact me on Twitter @paradoxrevealed or email me at metaparadox11 AT gmail DOT com
Dream Afar is a game of Belonging Outside Belonging, a hack of the excellent Dream Askew by Avery Alder and Dream Apart by Benjamin Rosenbaum.
Dream Afar introduces a vast multiverse of dimensions, guarded by you, the Interdimensional Guardians, who are headquartered in the pocket dimension called Anywhere. The multiverse is threatened by the malevolent and eternal Rift, which seeks to bring all dimensions under its influence. The spaces between dimensions are filled by the mysterious In Between, which may prove either helpful or harmful.
Plucked from numerous dimensions far-flung and diverse, teams of Interdimensional Guardians from across time and space use their powers to protect and push back the forces of the Rift, guided by Anywhere. You are one such team.
Your job is not easy. In fact, your life has never been the same since you became Guardians. Your primary companions are your team mates, because they’re the only ones who really understand. Even Anywhere has its problems, and the fight is neverending. Is it all worth it in the end? That’s up to you.
This ttrpg is currently in beta, and only the playkit is available. It's recommended only for those who are familiar with Belonging Outside Belonging games for now.
Camp Ravenrock is a queer sci-fi/fantasy Summer school visual novel/dating sim. It also has slice of life elements, queer friendships, mystery, and adventure. There are characters of color, disabled characters, and queer characters of all stripes! There will be explicit mention and discussion of asexuality and aromanticism! The romance-able characters are all women, as is the player character.
The plot follows the nameable main character who is about to spend a month at a secret Summer school program for non-humans and partial humans. She has 31 days to spend on taking classes, skipping classes, exploring, making friends, dating, figuring out the world she's been thrust into, and potentially unravelling the hidden plot of the game.
Some of the game will be the same each time you play, but there is enough content that even for the demo you'll have to play at least 5 times to see most of it. You can choose some of what your character does, but there are also some random elements to make things more interesting.
I started working on Camp Ravenrock in 2015, but barely got anywhere with it. But I started working on it again in September 2017. When I discovered Yuri Jam in October 2017, I got the push I needed to keep going and release this demo. The world the game is set in is something I've been working on since 2007.
The demo covers the first five in-game days. This game is suitable for ages 13+. There is talk of sexual orientation and attraction, as well as some swearing, talk of trauma and bad family issues, and mildly suggestive content.
Right now this is a very demo-y demo. The backgrounds are almost all free assets that will eventually be replaced with original art. There will be CGs, more sprite expressions, edits to rushed sprites, mini games, more music and sound effects, as well as more visual representation of things going on in the text. I apologize for the crappy sketch that is the auditorium background right now.
This version of the demo has approximately 41,700 words, not all of which are accessible in the demo, certainly not on a single playthough.
Also check out the Lemma Soft Forums post on this game: https://lemmasoft.renai.us/forums/viewtopic.php?f=43&t=46320
The Confluence is my American freeform LARP for the Golden Cobra Challenge. As of the time of writing, I'm still fixing it up in time for the September 25 deadline. It's a 4 page LARP playable online for 3-13 players. The concept is that you play sad, lonely gods who meet at a confluence of worlds every 100 years. At the beginning of the game, you don't know you're gods, for reasons that are explained later on in the game. This game is supposed to be sort of depressing. I'll link to the pdf here when it's done.
Mary Sue Dating Sim
Mary Sue Dating Sim is a project I've mostly worked on during the past 2 Yuri Jams, with little progress. It's an affectionate parody about "Mary Sue" stereotypes and defying them, friendship, and girl love both platonic and romantic. The idea behind it is that the characters are dropped into a pocket universe by a mysterious Author, who intends for them to fight to the death for his amusement for their supposed "crimes" against fiction. Instead, the girls become friends and potentially romantic partners, and work together to defeat the Author. Along the way, it becomes apparent that the girls are more than their stereotypes. The archetypes include: the overpowered princess magical girl, the cool space pirate, the antiheroine, the goth vampire girl, the anti-Sue woobie, the gadgeteer genius cyborg, and you, the self insert! I'm going to be working on this game again during this year's Yuri Jam. I don't expect to finish it though, since I went overboard with the number of characters!
Queer Zine Fest Simulator
Do the Thing
We Met Once, Perhaps in a Dream
We Met Once, Perhaps in a Dream is a short visual novel about immortality, memory, guilt, and lying. It was made in a week for Accessajam, an accessibility-themed game jam with a plot theme of "meet the neighbors." The game has a self-voicing option and an option to change the font to Open Dyslexic. If I'd had more time I would have expanded on the accessibility options.
The story is set in a world where science has granted its population eternal youth... but sadly their brains can't handle all the memories, and eventually people can only remember the last ten years of their lives. 671-year-old Amberlynn Keene recognizes her new neighbor when she moves in, but she doesn't know where she recognized her from or even what her name is. You get to choose whether Amberlynn looks into her past and what she does with this information. Be warned, this is a game that deals with gray areas of morality, and it is more on the depressing side. The game has about 8,500 words of text with 8 ending variations.
Content warning: suicidal ideation, death, depression, lying to a friend or romantic partner
The A-List is a short visual novel about a newly formed squad of asexual teen superheroes with "useless" powers having their turn to save the day. The prologue of this game was created for the October Rainbow Jam, whose theme was "combat without violence." I intended on working on this during Ace Jam, but didn't do much of anything. Still submitting it to add it to the collection of ace games.
More about the plot: Our heroine Julia Estevez, a.k.a. The Gray Lady, is just starting her Junior year at Astra Central High School for Metahumans. But, oh no! Not only is she placed into the lowest ranking squad and assigned to community service, but there's some trouble brewing in the school's Gay-Straight Alliance. And what's this about a new villain in town?!
Every one of the four main characters is on the asexual spectrum and their identities are explicitly named and discussed! There's POC and trans representation! Asexual jokes!
Right now this is just a super short demo that isn't currently available for download. It's pretty much linear and gives the intro to the story. It should only take about 5 minutes to finish. ~1,600 words.
Over Water, Under Hill
Over Water, Under Hill is a fantasy visual novel with RPG elements I've been working on for a while, but still haven't finished. I originally started working on it for Maximum Monster Month, and then for Ace Jam, but still haven't finished it for a variety of reasons, mainly mental health issues.
The visual novel is essentially about a biromantic asexual demon named Aelith and a homoromantic asexual siren named Neria teaming up to fight pirates and potentially fall in love or become non-romantic partners. To give a little more detail: The story begins with Aelith being summoned by a crew of pirates to do their bidding and lead them to gold. But then the pirates run into stormy seas and sirens, including Neria, who has never been very good at luring men to their doom, but ends up unintentionally rescuing Aelith and stealing her summoning crystal from the pirate captain. But the pirates are willing to go to great lengths to get Aelith back, and there's the small matter of Aelith being blood bound to the pirate captain. If he is defeated, she goes back to the world of demons, the Under Hell/Hill. And Aelith and Neria are starting to care for each other...
To be honest, I'm nowhere near finishing the game, though I have it all plotted out. I still have a lot of art and writing to do. But I'm putting this up now anyway so people who find Ace Jam in the future will see that this game was partially made for it.
Femme Story is a small, personal autobio VN project about my relationship to femininity and specifically queer femininity and gender identity. It will be mostly linear. I started this a long time ago and haven't worked on it since. It will follow me from the age of 5 to the age I am whenever I finish it.
Reflection of Souls
The Third Light